I think having a child is a major responsibility. In my opinion it should be planned in order to have a good experience. I have seen several of my cousins become pregnant at a very young age. I saw what they experienced and opted to not take the path they took. They were very young so when they told their parents it was not news of joy. I definitely did not want to disappoint my parents in this way. Also the child’s father was not an ideal parent, since they were involved in a gang, had no job, and completely irresponsible.
I must say college is not easy and it is stressful. I can just imagine how it much harder it would have been to continue with school while being a mother. I really do not think I would have been able to handle it. I would have probably not been a senior in college right now. My major did change from when I began college, because my career choice seemed it would affect my future when I decided to have a family of my own. I wanted a career where I could still make time for my husband and children and be involved in their life.
As of now I continue to opt childless. I am definitely not ready for a child. I still need to complete my school and possibly further my education. I want to establish a good job as well. I am not sure when I will become engaged; so until then I will continue enjoying life with my boyfriend by having fun. Whenever I get married I do plan on waiting a couple of years before starting a family. There are something’s we need to arrange, and we have some goals and aspirations. My boyfriend and I do talk about our future and what we expect and he is very supportive about my choices and plans.
I also do know that I do not want to have more than two children; three for me may be pushing it. My boyfriend wants an entire soccer team, but I know that will not happen. I hope he is joking. When I am ready to take that step I want to fully involve myself in preparing my mind and body for the pregnancy. I want to do everything possible so that my baby is healthy. There is a little fear with how I will look afterward and also about miscarriages. I saw what my sister in law had to go through and it looked like she was in a lot of pain. I really do not tolerate pain very well, which is another fear. I would love to have birth that does not involve drugs, however the thought is quite frightening.
As I am writing this I get nervous and scared, which ensures me I am definitely not ready. It is evident my opinion about having children is to wait once I am married with the person I love, have a career, experience the married life, and then have children.
I think you have made a wise choice! It seems like you have a clear cut idea of waht you want in life and that's great. I do have to warn you that when you do decide to have children that your mind will not be as clear as you image. The stress of trying to make sure eveything is being done correctly to ensure your baby's health can cause your hormones to change rapidly and you may not be able to concieve or you may increase the risk of miscarriage. I have been going through it for 6 months, that's how I know! Good luck with all your dreams and aspirations!
ReplyDeleteHaving children is a very BIG responsibility and I don’t think that some people realize that. I was watching Tyra Banks the other day and I can’t remember the exact number but there are a huge percentage of young teens whose goals are to have children. I think that kids are growing up really fast these days and children are having children before they get a chance to fully grow and find their selves. I don't think that they fully understand what having a child is really about. I am 21 and cant waiting to have a family and children but I know I am not ready and I am still in school. People need to make sure that they are ready to have a child before they make that commitment.
ReplyDeleteI do understand where you are coming from, having children while in college can be challenging. In order to achieve anything one must stay focused.
ReplyDeleteI think you have the right idea, and I have chosen to do the same. I want to have an established career and a sizeable savings account before I have a child, because I want my child to have everything he or she needs (but I don't want to spoil my kid--much). I have a friend who has two children, one that she had when she was 15 and one she had two years ago at age 26. She never graduated from high school, and her second child came soon after she graduated from college. I never understood why she chose to get pregnant during those times in her life. When we became closer friends, I discovered that she is against birth control and abortion, and that both pregnancies were unplanned and inconvenient but she, of course, loves her kids and feels that her life is enriched by them. I'm glad to have her as a friend because, among other reasons, her views are exactly the opposite from mine and I don't think I would have made the same choices she made. I want to be a good provider for my kids and I don't want to bring any children into the world until I can give them a good life.
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